Parents handling bullying the wrong way by encouraging their kids to fight

Reported by: James Tully

Contributor: Nate Wardle
Set Text Size SmallSet Text Size MediumSet Text Size LargeSet Text Size X-Large
Share
Updated: 3/19 10:46 pm
Parents handling bullying the wrong way. For some, they are setting up fights between their children and kids that were bullying them at school.

A case in Philadelphia, now followed by another in York.

CBS 21 spoke to Dauphin County’s Chief Deputy District Attorney about these shocking incidents.

Startling, shocking and just a flat out terrible method of parenting. Fortunately, it is not common.

Dealing with bullies, a child psychologist tells us, often times can be just as trying on the parent as the kid who’s getting picked on.

But encouraging your children to fight is not the way to handle it.

A cell phone camera captures a Philadelphia mom telling her 12-year old daughter to attack another girl who had been bullying her.

That woman is now facing simple assault charges.

“Nothing good can come of this,” chief Deputy District Attorney Sean McCormack stated. “The parent is the grown up and they have to act like it.”

Last month, an eerily similar situation occurred in downtown York.

Ana Diaz-Lopez now facing reckless endangerment charges for setting up a fight between her 13-year-old daughter and another female student.

“I would call it child endangerment not only for the child that's being beat up but for your own child,” explained McCormack.

Local child psychologist Risa Van Fleet suggested a few things parents can do if faced with bullying.

Number one is to control your feelings, it’s not about you.

Get your kid’s take on handling the situation and let them get it off their chest.

If it happened at school, call the school, it’s important they know what’s going on.

“Bullying is a hard situation,” McCormack told CBS 21. “To deal with, no easy answers but getting your child to pick a fight is not one of the answers you should be seeking.”

For parents asking why is my kid being picked on? It is recommended you go to school officials. Usually there is something that’s making them stand out, good or bad.

Even in good households not every child learns characteristics of good self-esteem.

Share
5 Comment(s)
Comments: Show | Hide

Here are the most recent story comments.View All

The views expressed here do not necessarily represent those of WHP CBS 21 [Harrisburg]

rockymountain - 3/20/2013 6:46 PM
0 Votes
I was the new kid in the neighborhood so you all know what that meant. Lets see how tough he is. Well it did not take me long to show them. A few right hooks,some upper cuts and some good solid well aimed jabs and they left me alone. My dad always told to make sure I did not start the fights but to make sure I finished it. A bully wants to do is show off to his friends how tough he is. If you face him down by himself he is a coward.

Rodney - 3/20/2013 11:37 AM
0 Votes
All this article told us is fighting back is wrong and the only thing it said for you to do was find out what is wrong with your child what a lousy article. Fighting back may not be the answer but it worked for me and a lot of other people. If you're going to post an article telling us what not to do in a situation then give us answers as to what to do and not point fingers at the victim

trapmaker - 3/19/2013 9:51 PM
0 Votes
I have to say I am in agreement with fighting back to a point. You MUST stand up for yourself and defend yourself. If you show other people you are weak then you put out the welcome mat for everyone to push you around because they know you wont do a thing about it.

Penny - 3/19/2013 9:37 PM
0 Votes
You made it the victims fault for getting bullied in your last 3 sentences. Then confronting the bully would be the best thing for them.

DaddyO - 3/19/2013 9:22 PM
0 Votes
I was bullied for years, up until the point that I fought back and cracked my 7th grade history book upside the bullies head after he stabbed me with a pencil in my leg. I did get suspended for 3 days but never had another problem from him or any other bully. Most bullies are cowards and thrive on fear, the moment they get faced up to they move on to the next victim. But that was back in the 70's when things were MUCH different.

Inergize Digital This site is hosted and managed by Inergize Digital.
Mobile advertising for this site is available on Local Ad Buy.